Refuse to Hate

Eight days ago, Californians passed the anti-gay marriage proposition by a narrow margin.  This saddens me but I am not surprised. 

It also disturbs me that many of the protest gatherings happening around the state are focused on the role of the Mormon church.  The church is very right wing and shockingly wealthy.

But I think it is a mistake to blame the Mormons.  My personal preference would be that we focus on our legislators and main street America.  If we pick one group to blame, I think we will miss the Freedom Train. 

Trading hate for hate, pointing the finger of blame, and declaring war on religious doctrine will likely backfire on us as a group.  Americans are very protective of their religious freedoms.  It's why this country was founded.

Recently, on my favorite lesbian message board, there has been some discussion about Prop 8.  I talked about forgiveness as a tool for moving through the strong emotions in order to carry on the cause.  A few have not been happy with that.

Once again, I will say here that forgiveness does not mean to lay down and die.  It means to see your opponent as a flawed human being, just like oneself, who has some ideas borne out of ignorance and misinformation.

What they need is information, example, and respect.  Not respect for their ideas but respect for their humanity.  Respect for their right to believe as they do.  And information to help them understand that this issue embodies the true meaning of the separation of Church and State; to understand that this is not an issue of religious doctrine but an issue of civil rights.

Thanks to Lori from Hahn at Home, I found this video from Refuse to Hate.  It is worth watching the entire video. 

 

Refuse to Hate from Refuse to Hate on Vimeo.

Comments

[Trop]

Yes. You are right. WE have to win hearts and minds of the value of marriage for all. It's GOOD for society when people have stable relationships, and it is in our collective interest to support stable relationships at every opportunity.

[RD]

Amen!

[Terra Sears]

I think that the more people that have this attitude the closer we get to making everyone side with the ideal of equality... Very nice read, thank you.

[280 Main]

I'm so glad I came across this post. I really needed to read it. I have been seething with anger since Prop 8 passed, and your perspective makes a lot of sense. Here's hoping that the protests around the country continue--and that they do educate and inform just as you're proposing.

[Teresa]

Hey, I found you again! I thought you had abandoned blogging forever. Good to see you back, and thanks for standing with us Californians.

Though I have participated in two demonstrations, I have avoided any specifically targeting religious institutions on holy days. Even at conservative churches, not every member voted against our rights, and those who did will only have their low opinions of us validated if we're seen to infringe on their worship.

Still, wouldn't it be a more wonderful world if certain conservative religious institutions stopped trying to remake the Constitution in the Bible's image? Or even if they decided that, just like it's OK to ignore those couple of lines about stoning disobedient children to death, it's also OK to ignore a couple of lines about men lying with men. If one is going to selectively read the Bible, why cling to passages that condemn citizens for behavior that rational humans now acknowledge is genetic, not learned?

Oops, sorry, trying to bring logic to the culture war again; I can't help myself sometimes.

[lori]

See, I start reading your blog all regular-like and you disappear for weeks on end. Coming back?

[Mary]

I think you're awesome!!!!!